Typo Tuesday

Newspaper Headlines

§  “The Clairvoyant Society will not have its usual meeting this week, due to unforeseen circumstances.”

§  20-Year Friendship Ends at Altar

§  Americans are offered perfect Grandfathers, one dwarf, one inlaid.

§  Antique Stripper to Display Wares at Store

§  Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft

§  Autos Killing 110 a Day—Let’s Resolve to Do Better

§  Ban On Soliciting Dead in Trotwood

§  Blind Woman Gets New Kidney from Dad She Hasn’t Seen in Years

§  British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands

§  Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy

§  Clinton Places Dickey In Gore’s Hands

§  Clinton Stiff On Withdrawal

§  Clinton Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead

§  CLOTHES BRUSH. The genuine pigskin back opens with a zipper and inside are tweezers, scissors, nail-file and a bomb

§  Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures

§  Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case

§  Enraged Cow Injures Farmer With Ax

§  Eye Drops Off Shelf

§  Fund Set Up for Beating Victim’s Kin

§  Gators To Face Seminoles With Peters Out

§  Governor Chiles Offers Rare Opportunity To Goose Hunters

§  Governor’s Penis Busy [should be “Pen Is”]

§  He was asked if he contemplated any further act of matrimony. ‘Certainly’ was his evasive reply.

§  The choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.

§  Please join us as we show our support for Amy and Alan in preparing for the girth of their first child.

§  Weight Watchers will meet at 7 p.m. Please use large double door at the side entrance.

§  Mr. and Mrs. Wally Burman of Sioux Falls have just arrived at the Lindau home where they will be housepests for several days.

§  Two Soviet Ships Collide, One Dies

§  Drunken Drivers Paid $1000

§  War Dims Hope for Peace

§  Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy

§  Latin Course To Be Canceled—No Interest Among Students

§  Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms

§  Marijuana Issue Sent To A Joint Committee

§  Married Priests In Catholic Church A Long Time Coming

§  Never Withhold Herpes Infection from Loved One

§  New Vaccine May Contain Rabies

§  Patient At Death’s Door–Doctors Pull Him Through

§  Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told

§  Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers

§  Prostitutes Appeal to Pope

§  Publicize your business absolutely free! Send $6.

§  Rose Petroleum Jelly Keeps Idle Tools Rust-free

Just for Laughs...

Hugs & Nightmares,

Savannah Rayne